We’ve been looking at the topic of confidence and how to be a more confident person. We started in Part 1 by defining what it means to be confident and last time in Part 2 we looked at what confidence is not. In this blog I want to provide some practical ways to increase confidence. These are things I have learned and relearned over the years. So, without further delay, here are three ways to boost your confidence.
Expand your knowledge– Self-confidence is a byproduct of knowledge. That is, when you have a deep understanding of something, you can’t help but be confident about it. It’s natural to be confident because your perspective is one of understanding.
Are you with me, grasshopper? Just checking. It’s been said, “Knowledge is power” and it’s true. Self-confidence is produced by knowledge. Expanding your knowledge base will expand your confidence base along with it. It’s like raising the water in a reservoir. All the boats on the lake will rise with the water. Don’t miss what I’m saying here. Make it your goal to expand your knowledge and confidence will follow.
You might be saying, “That’s easy to say, Ernie, but hard to do and you’re being a little vague. Knowledge is a broad topic, I need something more specific.” I get it. Stay with me, we’ll get there, I promise.
It comes down to learning and having the attitude of a learner. And to tighten things up a bit, the learning should have a focus. Focused learning is key.
Here’s what you do. Pick an area where you are not confident and learn everything you can about that area. Apply yourself to learn as much as you can and become an expert in that area. As you learn, your confidence will grow along with your knowledge about that subject. The truth is that insecurity and uncertainty often spring from an absence of knowledge. Change the playing field and you’ll change the game.
Practice being confident– A second way to grow in confidence is to practice being confident. Fake it till you make it. You will be surprised how effective this can be. We don’t typically think the mind will respond to the body’s lead, we typically think it’s the other way around, but that is not always the case. Body language can set the pace and line up the brain sometimes. It may sound weird, but it’s true.
My sister sent me an article a few years back about using body language to communicate confidence. It had specific advice on how to stand, how to interact, the kind of gestures to make and how to appear confident in the way you present yourself to others. From time to time, I would practice standing with confidence.
Guess what? It worked. It was a lot of fun too. Practice being confident. Do things with confidence and project confidence, and before you know it you’ll be more confident.
Decide to be confident. The third way to gain confidence is to make the decision to be confident. The human ability to make decisions is a powerful tool and in this case it is a useful tool that helps build confidence. Once we decide to be confident, our attitudes and our perspective will mostly line up with this decision.
This isn’t to say there won’t be doubts or challenges to that decision or even temptations to fall back into old insecurities and self-doubt. But once the decision is made, the power of those old insecurities will be broken. Sure, there may be lapses, or temporary setbacks, but they will be temporary.
The overall trajectory of life will be toward increased confidence because we made that decision. There may be lapses, but they will have less and less of an influence on us as we push toward a more confident approach to life.
If we’ve already made the choice to be confident no matter what, when the pressure to fall back into insecurity comes our way, we’ll be ready for it. We’ll have an answer when it comes knocking on our door. The decision has been made, and it will just be a matter of standing firm in it. We’ve chosen our path- the path of inner strength and fortitude.
There’s a lot more I could say about this, but time is short these days and so I’m going to wrap it up here. I hope what I’ve written in this DIY series so far helps you grow as a person. Thanks for taking the time to read what I’ve written and consider what it means for you.
Until next time,
Ernie